Home for 4 months now...

Our friend Haley and Scarlett on her fab red mini cooper!

Check out those cool pig tails. 

Snoozing girl. Isn't that sweet!!
Well I can hardly believe it but we have been home with Scarlett for 4 months today. And what a 4 months it has been. The first months with her were just trying to figure out how to be parents, what she would eat, watching her personality develop. She has really transformed from a baby to a toddler in these last months. She is not just walking now but running everywhere.

But it has really been in the last couple of weeks that I've felt like our attachment has been progressing and that we were on track. At the beginning of our time together I could only hold her when reading a book to her, or when rocking her to sleep. She was a girl on the go all the of the time. She is now getting a little more snuggly. She is also developing quite the sense of humor, she loves to giggle and play and to make us laugh. 

Last weekend was pretty horrible, Scarlett got sick on Wednesday and had to come home from day care, I stayed home with her on Thursday and Friday and then Saturday we had to take  her to the emergency room b/c her temperature was so high. She had a respiratory infection. Although that experience was beyond scary and Andy and I were soo tired b/c Scarlett wasn't sleeping well, just coughing a bunch, it did help with our bonding. Since she wasn't feeling good she was more willing to snuggle and be held. In fact on Thursday when we stayed home together she wanted in my lap and snuggled with me for about 20 minutes. I was in shock. It was one of those times where you don't want to move or breath, because you are afraid you'll mess it up. It was really the longest period of time I have held her, other than when she is sleeping. 

When I think that we have been home for 4 months,  it seems like we have had Scarlett forever. Time has been just flying by with her. I hope we will continue on this good streak of attachment and feel really great when we have our 6 month home study check in.

One last thought, before I was a mom, I always respected working moms, but I am not sure I had any idea how hard it was. When my co-workers had to leave early to take care of kid things sometimes I resented it. When my sister was constantly tired, I felt bad for her, but I am not sure I had the right amount of empathy. Now that I am going on 4 months of not getting enough sleep. Of getting home and trying to make dinner with a toddler hanging on my leg. Trying to balance big work projects and spending time with my family, I have a totally different view of things. I am beginning to think that the dark circles under my eyes will be permeant. I love being a mom but it is hard.